- go home after getting off work at 8 pm. don’t stop for food because payday is still 2 days away and buying red bull and renewing your flickr membership is more important than eating.
- find mystery frozen meal in freezer. decide it was there before you moved in almost 2 years ago. eat it anyway.
- play The Sims Social on facebook. have sim sex all over the place. it’s like a ludacris song up in your sim house.
- watch Blue Valentine. find out it’s possible for Ryan Gosling to look unattractive. cry a little.
- google rent prices in your home town. see a beautiful 3 BR victorian house for $700… total. cry some more.
- google “weird porn” to cheer yourself up and find out tentacle porn exists. realize you can never erase its existence from your brain.
- see advertisement for something called “goblins fucking” on the sidebar. decide to stop googling things when bored.
- spend 45 minutes looking at pictures of cats on weheartit.com to scrub your brain.
- can’t stop wondering what “goblins fucking” could be like. watch 2 minutes of goblins doing it*. wish you had stuck with the cats.
- give up on computer. do dishes while listening to Dashboard Confessional. drink boxed wine. pass out while watching the bomb episode of grey’s anatomy that you’ve seen 20 times, only because coach taylor’s in it.
- the end.
*spoiler alert: it’s the fight scene from the end of every power rangers episode… except with more penises.
want more maxie? of course you do. check out my post from yesterday on Twenties Hacker here. it’s about how to deal with annoying bitches on facebook.