I asked Alexa to interview me and she was nice enough to send me some delicious questions…but she replied with “you are a drunk whore” as the title. Because of this I’m going to refer to her as Smellexa this whole week. Deal with that, biatch!
Anyway. I’m sick today. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I think it’s something they call “worksucksandmybodyhasdecidedtodevelopaheadachebecauseidontwanttogo-itis.”
That’s just the technical term though– I don’t expect most of y’all to understand because it’s in ancient Latin. Let’s just refer to it as a “mental health day” and leave it at that.
I have lots of hilarious stories from the weekend which I will share tomorrow, but for now you can enjoy getting to know more about your favorite person ever– ME!
1. since you and deutlich have met more bloggers in real life than i have in my reader i’m going to go ahead and put you on the spot. whose blog personality is most genuine to their real life one?
Ben! Oh, the phone sex we have every weekend doesn’t count as “meeting”? Lame.
I’m going to say Arjewtino. He’s just as ridiculous and funny IRL as he is on his blog. (and he’s dreamy. don’t tell him I said that)
2. tell me a little something about life in west virginia does everyone really marry their cousin? also, tell me what it’s like to be a world famous blogger who operates on a dial-up connection.
Yes, I do know people who have married their cousin…and worse. Remember the pregnant by her brother story?
I actually have some direct inbreeding in my family line– my great-great-grandparents were first cousins. Whammmmy.
Dial-up sucks. They only offer satellite here and it costs $50+ for SLOW ASS internet (about 512k) and they don’t allow you to stream anything. Balls. There’s also a $300 start-up fee so I don’t think I’ll be getting that any time soon. If anyone wants to contribute to the “help maxie get high-speed so she can stream porn blog better” fund you can email me.
3. you recently won the 20SB award for the blogger that everyone most wants to get a beer with. what’s your beer of choice? and how many will it take for you to flash your ta ta’s to narm at the 20SB meet-up?
I only drink beer when I’m broke. Don’t worry– that’s a lot. Not to sound totally lame, but if I go to a brewery I just ask them to give me something that’s light and delicious. I usually love it, but can never remember what it’s called the next day. Maybe that’s a sign.
My normal beer of choice is miller light.
If I use the last blogger meet-up where I showed my boobs (coughbloggerationalballcough) as a reference point, I’m going to say approximately 10ish non-beer drinks. You can also contribute to this fund via email.
4. moving on to a more serious-ish note. if you could change one thing – either your career, your living location, or your age which one would you change and why?
this is a hard one. that’s what she said.
probably my career. I’d be an awesome brain surgeon that had already finished medical school at the age of 18 and discovered the cure for brain cancer, allowing her to retire at the age of 23. YES!
in all seriousness I would really pick career and I’d go with something that made lots of money and allowed me to party like a rockstar on the weekends. and the weekdays. maybe heiress? or professional blogging?
5. on a WAY WAY WAY more serious-ish note. what blogger do you want to dry hump till you are chaffed? (other than arjewtino – he’s mine)
Well I already have plans to dry hump ben at the meet-up, but over the weekend a few awesome bloggers (and fake bloggers) I hung out with threatened to hire security for ben, so I need a backup plan.
I’m thinking Dolce. DAMN it. She’s pregnant and also something called “responsible” so she won’t be attending the meetup.
Maybe Crissy? ALSO PREGNANT. Fuck babies!
I’m going to stick with Ben. I’m 99% sure I can take out any security y’all hire anyway.
Matt says:
there’s alot of dry humping in this post.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:06 am
lbluca77 says:
The line to get a chance to dry hump Ben is going to be out the door. But so worth the wait I bet
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:11 am
Racquel Valencia says:
These questions ruled. I’m impressed that she managed to refrain from asking you what you’re wearing. That’s usually the first thing I wanna know.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:15 am
deutlich says:
I’m wondering how Arjewtino feels about these claims that he’s Alexa’s.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:19 am
LiLu says:
How on EARTH did I miss the ta tas at the Bloggeration Ball?!? I might just have to make it out to Chicago…
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:21 am
Ben says:
Wow! That’s a whole lot of Ben-references in one post! You really took it to the next level.
Let’s schedule our next phone date.
Or should I also let you know that I’m pregnant too?
It’s yours.
I expect payments.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:26 am
Crissy says:
I think Ben is the right choice. I know I’d pick him anyway.
There’s very little room on my body for humping right now as my husband cries about nightly.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:29 am
Liebchen says:
Did Arjewtino pay you to say he’s dreamy?
Also, with all the promises of flashing and humping at this meet-up, I don’t know how I could NOT go.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:40 am
Antonella says:
Dreamy, huh? I guess I’ll have to appear at the meeting and dry hump him…do we all have to dry hump people?
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:48 am
Jacqueline from MissMusing says:
This post is too funny. I actually spit out Diet Coke on my computer screen reading it and the comments.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:53 am
Amanda says:
the more and more madness that is promised at the meet-up, the more and more depressed I am that I can’t go. Why can’t you guys all be boring, non-drinkers who want to sit around discussing philosophy all weekend Why!?
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 10:08 am
rs27 says:
You would think Arjewtino is mother f’in Brad Pitt.
Wait, he is?
Damn him to hell.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 10:13 am
Arjewtino says:
I believe that only on your blog would I ever read the sentence “Fuck babies”. This is why I love you. And Alexa.
Oh, and thanks for planning the 20SB conference on my birthday. Was that my present?
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 10:14 am
Rachel says:
I had a great time meeting you Saturday! I’ll be in the DC area later this month. Maybe we can hook up. Or meet up. But I’d rather hook up. Just sayin.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 10:45 am
alexa says:
1. i called you a drunk whore because you called me one first!
2. never in my life did i think that you would have actual inbreeding in your family tree! (makes a lot of sense)
3. this was very funny my friend, you did have some kick ass questions to answer though courtesy of ME.
xo
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 11:02 am
andhari says:
LMAO wish I could come just to see you take out all the securities to dry hump Ben
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 11:24 am
Paula says:
I think Alexa (sorry – “Smellexa”!) definitely wins the prize for most inventive questions so far!
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 11:37 am
Mermanda says:
Wow! I am so interested to hear about your weekend! I wonder what you did/saw/ate/slept on/monster.
Ooops.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 11:41 am
verybadcat says:
I will help you with the security problem if I can hose Ben off and use him when you’re done.
Also? Dial up SUX and satellite? A total rip off. All my hopes are set on Verizon’s broadband signal……
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 11:42 am
so@24 says:
Boobs? Beers? This post had the makings of an epic entry. I’m sold.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 12:07 pm
Kelly says:
Funny! I too have the rare “worksucksandmybodyhasdecidedtodevelopaheadachebecauseidontwanttogo-itis.”
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 12:24 pm
Beth says:
my dream job is Heiress… can you go to college for that??
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 1:09 pm
sarahbelledotcom says:
smellexa, how clever.
ben is totally not making it back to halifax in one piece.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 1:52 pm
Chris says:
I think you might, just maybe, be obsessed with Ben.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 2:11 pm
Andrea says:
So glad you came up to visit us in the ‘burgh… for that, we’ll make sure the security guards are a bunch of wimps.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 2:53 pm
fizzgig says:
dial up? my sticks are better than yours. i have a local cable company that offers internets for 25 bucks. Yesssssssss! i don’t opt to partake in their cable however, because that sucks balls.
I hear pregnant is going around. may the force be with you. (now you say…and also with you….k. thx)
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 3:15 pm
katelin says:
can someone please video tape the ben and maxie encounter at the meetup? i need to see this!
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 4:27 pm
Lindsay says:
Great questions! I need a mental health day, too. Can you catch worksucksandmybodyhasdecidedtodevelopaheadachebecauseidontwanttogo-itis over the Internet?
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 4:32 pm
EMUjournalist says:
I tagged you for the Honest Scrap Award! See my blog for the rules, etc.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 6:42 pm
Jessica says:
I love the title of your post. I am just a whore, sadly, not a drunk one yet. Yet.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 6:56 pm
bFlat says:
I had no idea you had dial up. How do you survive??
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 7:21 pm
Courtney says:
bahaha well gosh, ya’ll are makin me jealous, this 20sb “meet up” is apparently more of a 20sb orgy. i want to go.
[Reply]
February 9th, 2009 at 9:42 pm
BIBI says:
Hahahaha! You are too funny. It’s great to get to know a little more about you! Unreserved and you speak your mind! I like that.
Totally get the dial-up connection. I live in VA (the very rural part) and have dial-up as well. It sucks, but hey it does what it is suppose to do!
[Reply]
February 10th, 2009 at 8:59 am
jenniferalaine says:
hahaha i love you. i’ll cause a distraction for the security so you can attack ben. i’m pretty sure he’d like it anyway… YAY CHICAGOOOOO!
[Reply]
February 12th, 2009 at 6:06 pm